Hayda Lebnan Ya 3ayne
Although Lebanon is thought to be a pioneer state in the Arab world in its commitment to the respect of human rights (sit el ghina wala sit el fo2er), w ma3 enno it played a role in the elaboration of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights through a leading Lebanese figure, Dr. Charles Malek, bteje el sayfiye every year to remind us 2enno our dear balad hay2to la ketib hal declaration wala 7atta 2ariya!
It’s Sunday. You have two choices: You can either spend it on the beach or you can chill in bed, try to relax after a hectic week at work, turn on your TV and surf from one local TV channel to another searching for some entertainment... Lazy me picked TV, yes Lebanese TV, and this is what I came up with.
For a a country “whose statesman is a fox, whose philosopher is a juggler, and whose art is the art of patching and mimicking”, and for a country whose society is “divided into fragments, each fragment deeming itself a nation”, Lebanon is making remarkable progress towards achieving national unity. For once, Lebanese people agreed 3a mouracha7 wa7ad for the country’s lodestar position and for an impressive period of 31 days.
We wait for hours standing in line, too! We are gamblers too! To us, the younger generation, this crapshoot is something else. We stand in line and roll the dice as well, but for a stupid reason: trying desperately to get into one of the most prestigious nightclubs in Beirut! The casino rule is that the House Always Wins.
We, Lebanese, consider ourselves shi gher shekel. Not only do we go clubbing every night of the week, mix two to three languages when we speak, but we also borrow technical and scholarly words from psychology and different specialized domains and toss them into casual conversation on a daily basis. Read on for RAGMAG’s Lebanese dictionary where nothing is as it seems.
Given the prevailing kabt within Arab communities and the current media’s stereotype of Lebanese women, this propaganda has indeed succeeded. Now, if you too believe that Lebanese women are “liberated”, à la Myriam Klink and her ilk ya3ne, RAGMAG urges you to look at liberation from a whole different angle!
El hake el Lebnene is the classiest, most romantic and inspiring way of expressing one’s feelings. Forget about all the other chatter (my love, ma chérie, mi amor), and all the sweet words Hollywood has fooled you into liking. Even though to2brine nchalla’s literal translation in English is, “may you bury me, God willing”! We all know that, in Lebanon, it is the most intense form of love expression.
The analysis of the ideal state-citizen relationship lies at the core of political science studies. This is why RAGMAG decided to examine this particular relationship in Lebanon for our October issue. Yes, dear readers, we are experts bi kel chi, even when it comes to political issues. After all, we are Lebanese and that gives us the right to pretend that we know everything, even if we don’t!
Eventually, Abou Koko, the guy selling ka3k in the neighborhood, can expand his services and become a hairdresser too, overnight. Tante Najwa, kamen, can expand her khyata’s shop into a mini beauty institute. 2enno chu fiya? The woman discovered her make-up talent faj2atan. This is all still okay by and large, small expansions like Abou Koko’s or Tante Najwa’s are not the ones we should worry about. Bil natije, 2el cheghel mech 3eib.
Before you say you don’t believe in numerology, we are offering you proof in Lebanese society. Though ridiculed by mathematicians, scientists, and skeptics, the use of numerology to predict how events will unfold according to the energy patterns of specific numbers stands on firm grounds. Before you say you don’t believe in numerology, we are offering you proof in Lebanese society. The number “30” predicts, with remarkable accuracy, a series of events that marks the life of Lebanese people, both men and women.
Analyzing the conspiracy theory behind Lebanon’s deteriorating conditions would be boring to you. This is sad but in many ways, not unexpected. We’re all so tired from the tonzir and te7lil, spamming our TV channels, radio stations and newspapers. But, evaluating the state of some crucial sectors can give you a very clear idea about wen kenna w wen sorna.
The Lebanese Ministry of Tourism is expected to launch a new campaign soon dubbed “Shou fi bi Lebnen” to promote Lebanon as an international tourist destination. This initiative came at a critical time when Gulf countries, among others, were issuing travel warnings urging their citizens to avoid visiting “dangerous” Lebanon. Clashes erupting here and there were leaving people wounded and there was general civil unrest. While this much-needed initiative (Shou fi bi Lebnen) is deeply appreciated, RAGMAG is pretty sure that it will not yield the desired benefits.
Not every mother genuinely deserves a round of applause on Mother’s day. It is true that we may not have the particular right to classify moms into categories, but when it comes to March 21st, we think that it is time to point out that not all moms are created equal!
Lebanese don’t need financial experts, books or conferences to manage their finances well. Lebanese don’t change their lifestyle to maintain a balanced budget. Lebanese don’t worry, even when money gets tight. So to the people of the world RAGMAG suggests you forget everything the financial experts have taught you and stick to Hayda Lebnen’s 7 simple tips for a well-balanced budget this year and every year.
Don’t get us wrong, we are not saying that we’re greedy, shallow or in any way different from the other nationalities, but let’s be honest – the answer to this particular question in this particular country is to a large extent, unfortunately very predictable.